✩Heather Ashley Chase✩

TOP 50 Heather Ashley Chase read self help books on January 30, 2003

I spend so much time in BOOKSTORES. (yes I’m a geek). I find these always to be Helpful. enjoy.

The TOP TEN SELF-HELP BOOKS:

-by heather Ashley Chase

1. Wallow: The Unabridged Exploration of Unfairness in the Universe

2. “””””Title TBD: Fighting Procrastination and Stuff”””””

3. Pretending To Heal The Shame That Binds You

4. Teddy, I Have A Headache: Saying No to Libidinous Plushies—–**KATHERINE and “MAN” that one is for YOU!******

5. You Still Tha Phreaky Bomb-Diggity: Coddling Your Hip-Hop One Hit Wonder

6. How To Alienate Friends And Annoy People **hmmmm wonder who does THIS easily?**

7. Farewell Crusty Keyboards: Breaking the Cycle of Internet Sex Addiction

8. The Courage to Sniff Thongs

9. Feeling Good About Being A Fat, Ugly Moron

10. Hands Off Our Package!: Coping With Your Incestuous Conjoined Twin

11. Sweat the Small Stuff: Embracing the Wisdom of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

12. Staying Clean: The Super Fun World of Puzzles, Bingo, and Endless Apologies

13. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Sociopaths

14. My District is Huge: How To Score With Capitol Hill Interns

15. The Art Of Faking Happiness

16. I’m Heavily Medicated, How Are You?

17. 101 Ways To Bat Your Eyelashes And Giggle Like A Child-like Idiot ****

18. What Else Is There? The Secret to a Loving Loveless Marriage

19. She Wants It Bad: Convincing Women to Look Past Your Inherent Detest-ability

20. After The Affair: Never Letting Go of His Cheating Nuts

21. Past Lives, Future Healing: The Benefits of Avoiding Today

22. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Lining the Pockets of Opportunistic Publishers

23. Who The Fuck Spilled Paint In The Garage? Acknowledging and Ignoring Your Violent Temper****

24. 101 Ways to Envy Your Friend’s Transformed Life

25. The Unbearable Pain Of Failure: The Sequel To The Best Selling “Thinking Big: The Key To Personal Power”

26. Don’t Have Children And Take Care Of Your Bowels: Lessons My MOTHER Taught Me

27. ** Instant Popularity: The Leg Spreading’ Way

28. I’m Okay. You’re Okay. Everything’s OKAY, Okay? Get Off My God-damned Back For Once?!

29. Dianetics: Peace and Success Through Closeted Hollywood Stardom & Tithing

30. Escaping The Kevin Bacon Spiral

31. Chicken Soup For The Disgruntled and Homicidal Postal Worker’s Soul **

32. Men Are From Mars, Women Have No Penis

33. What The Shell: Looking Inward And Staying There

34. Self Help Help – The Definitive Guide to Personal Improvement Literature

35. Drinking A Fifth And Smacking Yourself In The Head With A Hammer: Winning Strategies for Communicating With the Dead *****

36. Exploiting The Emotional Pornographer Within: Woody Allen’s Recipe For Success

37. Like,Boundaries: I am NOT a DICK Tease

38. Love Is Letting Go of “Your Good Female Buddy Who Just Happens to Work at a Strip Club”****OH YEAH TROLL

39. *The Drill: Redundantly Re-Igniting the Passion

40. Everything I Ever Needed to Know I Learned from the Moonies

41. Unleash Your Inner Post-Apocalyptic Mutant Biker!

42. Mine All Mine: Contesting Your Wealthy Relatives’ Last Wills & Testaments

43. Lip Service: Success Tips For Actresses

44. Bad To The Last Cup: Fighting the Coffee Colonic Addiction

45. Too Loud, Too Big, Too Dirty, Too Hairy: Survival Tips for the Sensory Defensive Maximum Security Cellmate

46. Go 2 Bed J – Parenting With Post-its

47. It’s Not Love, It’s Just a Hand-job

48. Emotional Irrelevance: Why Nobody Cares About Your Feelings

49. Pour Me Another: Cementing Dysfunction in Co-Dependent Relationships

50. Auto-Lobotomization for Dummies

****END SCENE****